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Previous News in 2017
New book review - "THE POWER OF EMPATHY" by Philip Lai and Robert Wang (Posted on May 13, 2017)
What is Empathy?
First of all, we are born to have empathy. Therefore, it is not about are you empathetic or not. It is about how empathetic you can be.
Being empathetic is to:
- Perceive things in according to another person's frame of reference instead of self
- understand how another person feels and thinks
- reflect your understandings to them.
It is important to acquire empathy in our daily life. It does not only help in building trust and understanding between colleagues, but also a big step towards a civilized world.
Why do I write this type of book?
Firstly, I found that I had problem related to empathy. There was something wrong with my communication with my bosses, colleagues and clients. I did not understand them in their perspectives. My needs and my priorities were the most important things compared to caring for other's needs. Consequently, many problems have emerged.
Of course, it is easier to discover the lack of empathy in other people! For example:
- When the lift is opened, people would not let the people inside go out first. Instead, they rush into the lift to make sure themselves can get in first.
- When people drive from side street to main street, they would not slow down and yield to the traffic from the main street.
- Most of the sales only care about what they want to sell, but not what the customers need, let alone talking about creating a good customer experience.
Of course, my experience at a bakery shop named 85 C was my greatest push for such a book!
See what happened.So what kind of problems can power of empathy solve?
If one is able to develop the power of empathy:
- Our living quality will be improved as we have advanced our communication skills! (More trust and less conflict)
- Our society will be more civilized too. (A society with understanding, respectfulness and good cohesion)
Who do not want an empathetic boss who understands our needs; an empathetic colleague who can think in different perspectives; and an empathetic subordinate worker who can stand in our perspective to work as fellow team member?
Who do not want to deal with empathetic sales person, doctor, banker, teacher, etc who are willing to understand our needs when we subscribe to services?
How can we develop the power of empathy then?
First, as mentioned above, it is not about do you have empathy or not. It is about how you develop empathy.
For example: everyone can do push-up, right? The answer must be yes. However, can everyone do 50 push-ups in a minute? Definitely yes too, but we need some time to get trained though.
Empathy can be trained too in according to the above theory. Perseverance is the key element to develop our power of empathy.
"1-3-5+ model"
- 1 attitude (1 positive attitude)
- 3 principles (understand the principles of empathy rationally)
- 5 or more training (Practice makes perfect)
The model gives an idea of what persistent practices are. Power of empathy will be enhanced after these training.
Reading this book will be a good start. There are many workshops related to empathy will be held too. Our visions are:
- Helping entrepreneurs and managers to develop the wisdom of empathy;
- Empathy training course about the wisdom of leader for new managers;
- Empathy training course about the wisdom of creating love for families;
- Empathy training course about the wisdom of gaining customer's trust for sales;
The empathy training course and the tailor-made action and reflection scheme for our students are our best guarantee.
Enquiry: Enquiry@ecil.hk
To learn more about "The Power of Empathy" or other ECIL learning resources, please contact us via the form at the bottom of the
Learning Resources page.
什么是同理心？
首先，我们每一个人天生下来就有同理心，所以，不是有没有的问题，只是多少的问题而已。
同理心是能够站在对方的观点，理解对方所表达的想法和感受，同时也能够把这份理解反馈于对方。
同理心的发挥对我们日常生活非常重要。它不单单是在于建立人际间的理解与信任起关键作用，整个社会的文明基础也需要依靠大多数人同理心之发挥。
为什么会写这样的一本书？
首先，我发觉自己的同理心实在有问题，生活中，工作里的出现的问题，特别是人际沟通合作的问题，都是与我没有足够的同理心有关。我没有站在对方的立场来理解他们；一切以自我为中心，我的需求，我的Priorities，我的理由，等等大于一切。这样情况下不出问题才怪！
当然，我在别人身上就更容易发现缺乏同理心的问题啦！
- 电梯一打开，不是先让里面的人出来，而是一窝蜂强闯进去；
- 开车的，小路进大路，不看大路的情况，不减速反而加速；
- 大部分销售，只想着自己要卖什么，一点都不关心顾客需要什么，更不用说所谓的客户体验；
那么同理心的力量究竟是解决了什么样的问题呢？
如果同理心的力量得到提高。。。
- 我们自己的生活质量会有所提升，因为我们与别人相处起来会不一样！理解多了，信任会增加；矛盾与冲突自然会有所减少。
- 我们社会的文明程度也会有所进步。拥挤的客观环境不会有所改变，但我们会感觉不一样，因为多了一份说不出来的互相理解，尊重，和协调，那就是所谓的真正的社会文明。
- 最后，试想我们哪一位不想遇到一个有同理心的老板，能够想到员工的需要；与懂得换位思考的同事合作; 和能够站在我们立场思考的下属员工一起打拼，在商店，银行，医院，学校，等地遇上愿意尝试了解我们需求的销售人员，客服人员，医生护士，老师，等等
那么同理心的力量是怎样可以得到提升呢？
首先，之前说过，不是有没有同理心的问题，是如何提升的问题。
打个比喻：是不是每一个人都可以做俯卧撑呢？答案肯定是。是不是每个人都可以在一分钟内做完50个俯卧撑呢？答案也应该是，但是，我们需要一段时间的锻炼才可以做得到。
同样的道理，同理心的提升也是需要锻炼的，持之以恒的锻炼是可以增加我们同理心的力量的必需条件。
有效的锻炼是需要一些方法，我们就叫它为1-3-5+ 方法。
即，1个心态，3项原则，5个或以上的锻炼，持之以恒的锻炼。
简单来说，我们需要从1个正确的心态出发，加上理性地了解跟同理心相关的原则，最后加上一些具体行动来加强我们同理心的肌肉，力量就自然随着我们的锻炼而产生了。
阅读这本书是一个好的开始，我们之后也会有相关的工作坊予以配合。我们的愿景：
- 帮助企业家与经理人，开启同理心治愈世界的智慧；
- 同理心新经理课，带队伍的智慧；
- 同理心家庭幸福课，行动创造幸福的智慧；
- 同理心营销服务课，赢在人心的智慧；
这些同理心训练课程加上我们为学员设计21天的行动与反思计划是个人成长的最好保证。
Enquiry: Enquiry@ecil.hk
To learn more about "The Power of Empathy" or other ECIL learning resources, please contact us via the form at the bottom of the
Learning Resources page.
